A New Chapter - Week 9
I know I have already blogged once this year with the title of "The Next Chapter". But this "New Chapter" is completely different. From becoming an all red seeing, rabies bitten, and absolute lunatic this last week, I gladly am ready to announce, I have changed. Yes I have wrote 5 total blogs this week and deleted them. In order here were the titles:
1.) The Red Wedding
2.) The Wolverine
3.) Fork in the Road
4.) Matt Row was always wrong but right
5.) Personal State of the Union
To give a quick TLDR to what was in those written blogs:
- The Red Wedding: I was coming for everyone's throat.
- The Wolverine: I was coming for everyone's throat but adding Hugh Jackman pictures.
- Fork in the Road: I was coming for everyone's throat and maybe leaving the league.
- Matt Row was always wrong but right: I as coming for everyone's throat and I was going to leave the league.
- Personal State of the Union: I was coming for everyone's throat, blowing up the league this year, and then willing to burn $100 every year to blow up the league.
Note: Thank you Brian for having my back and taking a 45 minute phone call when I am screaming with pure rage over fantasy football and putting up with it.
As I had entered my mind palace like Charles Magnussen (where I remember every interaction via face-to-face or over text) over this last week.
I found that I was just not having fun in this league. I have already stated that I truly find dynasty to be my ultimate soul mate and the nonsense that happens in the league on a weekly basis wasn't worth my anger. But in my mind palace I remembered I wrote this:
Truly remembering that this a group of best friends trying to enjoy their time and give each other shit while playing fantasy football. I wrote about the "Purpose" of our league in Bieber blog.
Knowing that I am the one who has wrote (now) 49 total blogs over the last 4 years and you all know that I am an absolute lunatic, I should know that I will be trolled/bullied the most.
Every single one of these blogs had some sort of breakdown and wrapped up with my power rankings. I found that I had lost my way and really haven't done either one of those now for the latter portion of a year and a half. So going forward for the remainder of this year and into the next few years I will be getting back to the basics and focusing on what's important.
The new wrinkle I am going to implement when I now enter the "old blogs" and or "basics" is new categories that will carry on each week. I still will be ironing those out but until then lets currently dive into some of them. Categories will fluctuate week-to-week depending on the amount of entries we have but lets kick off this new formatted blog.
Dumbest Text of the Week:
Oh my god, we have two submissions of the week!
Chris: 
You sir are in the running for dumbest fucking text of the week! Quick question, do you know what FAAB means? Technically you just spent $8 on Jayden off waivers so before this you were sitting at $72 available. "Kyle is just gonna buy up all the waivers and flip them". Hey dumbest text of the week candidate, you could've made the highest offer because you had the most FAAB to work with before Wednesday morning!! Wait this even gets better!! You spent your FAAB on:
I know this may sound crazy. Like truly truly crazy. But what makes you in the running for dumbest fucking text of the week:
You've made a total of 2 FAAB offers (one being this week) on backup running backs as the teams starter goes on IR for the year through week 9!! You haven't been buying at the running back position at all this year and you're crying???? And part two of this is "I am going to flip them for better value".
Ever since keepers have been introduced to this league I have been typing quite literally like clockwork by week 6-10 on what bottom teams should do once they are out of it. No fucking shit I am trying to flip my team for keepers next year. I can't make the playoffs. Oh and just as a reminder.
I drafted my entire team with the intention on not winning this year but having the best keepers options for next year.
Kirk:
Note: I swear to fucking god threaten me with blowing up the league again I fucking dare you.
Simp of the Week:
I spoiled this already..... William congrats!!
Power Rankings:
As we dive into CURRENT power rankings and the new categories of the blog. This will be the last time I type this out and or say this out loud as apparently nobody can read or is listening:
Week 11 is the trade deadline and if you are at the bottom of the league it is time to suck it up and start selling for keepers. Yes you will be trade raped. These other teams don't need our players to win but because as of week 9 nobody knows what the punishment is for this league and or doesn't seem to care. Take full advantage of it. Just so everybody is well aware and hears me loud and clear: I WILL BE SELLING MY ENTIRE TEAM FOR KEEPERS GOING INTO NEXT YEAR. If you are one of these teams:
I strongly advise you start knocking on the doors of the bottom teams looking for super advantageous trades. If you can get a four players for one, and then continue trading you can be in a great spot. For example:
- I traded 2 players for Josh Allen, but I had a trade lined up on the back end to flip Allen already for 3 different players. Meaning even if you don't need all four just look at who needs what and make these trades as compounding or multiple trades rather just you and one other person.
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#1.) Kirk - between you and me I think you sent me the "your gonna blow it up text" because you know you currently have the best team in the league but when I ship CMC, Dowdle, and Tracey you got a wittle scared. Again nobody else can read this and its between you and me. Also if you wanna see what a blown up league looks like just give me the word because I can match. It may not show up in your PF category but people may forget you had CD on IR. The Hockenson start over Andrews is odd but we will see. The ravens are starting to remember Henry is their RB and are giving him more playtime-touches than the previous 7 weeks. Having 5 players that cna slide into your two flex spots is fantastic but a weekly juggle that if you get right... I think you are currently unbeatable.
#2.) Chris - I am putting respect on your name!!! I am currently putting you here but I can see a scenario were it doesn't end up this way for you. The JK Dobbins and Javonate Williams are without a doubt the steals of the draft and Keenan last round isn't talked about enough. My only real worry about your team is you have the highest floors and lowest ceilings of the top 5 IMO. JK dobbins snap count is down to 50%, we've seen Chase with and without Flacco, Kyren has been very weird this year, and Gradsen for the Chargers is clearly eating into Allen. Kelce seems to be rolling which typically means he gets the old snap count at the end of the season before the Chiefs win the superbowl. Jayden has been injury prone and sophmore slump has been thrown around. I think you can win this whole thing but I also can see you getting bounced playoff week 1.
#3.) Brian - People really aren't talking about your WR core so I'd like to take a minute and discuss that. Olave and Odunze are both top 15 recievers and then on top of that you have two #1 guys when healthy in London/Puca. Kind of wild to look back and "Brian is just going receiver every round" during the draft and now those 4 are top 15. Chase Brown with Flacco back there is back to being a baller and I was 100% right on Drake Maye this year and I wish instead of people making fun of me weekly in the group chat should own up to the fact nobody has been more right ever. You have holes at RB2 and TE but seeing that your bench is entirely backup RB's you clearly know that and are praying for someone to die. PS: I do see Mike Evans is on your IR still.
#4.) Alan - Maybe a shocker to some to see the highest PF getter in the league this year at #4 on the rankings. But I think he knows why and I think he knows the inevitable is coming. Mahomes, JT, and Amon will win games by themselves but once Hampton comes back your RB issues are mirroring Brians. The utmost and all credit goes to you and the waiver wire chris read this additions: White and Vidal have plugged up the holes but we know what's coming. Pray AJ brown doesnt comeback and pray the TE carousel treats you well.
#5.) Lukas - With Nabers healthy this is a different ranking. I think this team is great on paper and has a very high ceiling and a high floor BUT has no bench. Bo and sutton have found their groove compared to early in the season. I was wrong on James Cook and he will continue to eat. Gibbs eat. Deebo with Jayden is very good and Warren with the Steelers has been beyond better than projected. If Tony pollard does get traded and Spears gets the bulk work your in this thing. Laporta is a weekly "wins games or does nothing" but the duo of running backs with the Bo + Sutton combo keeps you in the top 5.
#6.) Will - You hung in there and battled back to .500. Rashee coming back and Hampton coming back is why I have you so high. Gadsen is apparently the new jesus incarnate and with Travis hunter now on IR literally only BTJ is their to catch the ball. Question marks around AJ Brown, Kenbone Walker, and BTJ can either have you winning this league and or staying even keel. I think you have a super high ceiling and super low floor though. Like theoretically you are starting Hurts + AJ Brown, Ladd + Hampton + Gadsen.... Say one week the chargers and eagles get slammed......... you got some problems.
#7.) Dustin - The bucky injury, burrow injury, Lamar injury, and nico not panning out has sunk you. Truly is what it is. Alan holding Rachaad killed you. Goodnews is bucky is back soon, Flacco makes higgins good, Lamar for Zay is back, and I kinda am starting to believe in this Texans team which means Nico should be back. I will say clearly the CD comeback has hit Ferguson to some extent. Now, I don't think thats a weekly thing but I do think that impacts his normal numbers. Personally you have a major major issue at the flex position and may need to hit waivers to clear that up as Coleman/Kupp are drop candidates for me.
#8.) Dan - You have some bright bright stars and a bright future with those stars. Warren and Pickens going into next year is so lit. But the RB room for you has been a problem. I hope they continue to give the workload to Breece and pray JJ to JJ works. Moore has been an absolute bust and your flex spot is also a problem. That being said, Breece/Pickens/Warren/DJ-Dak still makes you better than us bototm dwellers down here.
Tank-A-Thon Boys:
#9.) Doug - Briefly: Saquon/Wilson/Judkins/Pittman makes you better than the bottom. Wilson and Judkins are hurt and Saquon has been a bust for where he was drafted.
#10.) Kyle/Me - I think beat Cody this week which is why I think I am higher than him.
#11.) Cody - I put you below me because I think I beat you this week.
#12.) Austin - you have to start Emanuel Wilson this week and Travis hunter is on IR out for the season.
I took about 5.5 seconds to do the bottom 4 rankings as it doesn't matter this week so doug, cody, and austin please don't be offended.
I think its important to note that I think none of these rankings really mean all that much. If us bottom 4 do what I think we could do than I think anyone 1-8 has a run at this thing.
Goodluck everyone!!
~~ My Brain
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