And I'm proud to be an American
Where at least I know I'm free
And I won't forget the ones who died who gave that right to me
And I'll gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today
Cause there ain't no doubt I love this land, God Bless the USA.
(Not one of you read that, instead sang it^)
Back in 1776 on the 4th of July 56 delegates got together and signed the decleration of independence from the "fooking brits". Close your eyes and imagine the room. The tension, the bravery, and leadership needed from these men to pave the way to create the greatest country of all time for hundreds of years come. One quote to me really describes the true vibe of this world changing gathering of the minds: John Hancock upon signing the Decleration of Independence "we must now all hang together" to which 4 eyes himself Benjamin Franklin replied "Yes, we must indeed all hang together, or most assuredly we shall hang seperately". Simply euphoric. These men not only provided Mr. Klosterman endless amounts of wet dreams but also put their lives, their families lives, and an entire country lives on the line for Democracy and the right to vote. To honor them is to vote, so lets see what see what putting their lives, families lives, and entire nations lives at risk/war 246 years ago got them.
If you can read that or not, Tim Ryan released a new ad after he lost. Who the fuck thought that was a good idea to release a pro-vote campaign ad after they lose? Along with that across the bottom he says JD Vance was "was a big hit at Washington cocktail parties". Okay, okay, maybe not the best use of sacraficing family members and an entire country for someone releasing a new ad post losing, while claiming his opponent was the fucking man and lit at some Washington party. In fairness to the 56 men who signed a document that everyone agreed would get them hung, lets give this another shot.
I mean, what the fuck are we doing here. Biden is going full Klosterman on a scooter, while the opposition is just I guess watching him climax? The slogan of "Taxing Tim Ryan" had me actually for a month or two wondering why the fuck we were taxing Tim Ryan so much/what did he do to deserve to be taxed this much. Goodnews is he didn't use anyones donated money to his campaign. Instead JD hired a 5 year old to use "paint" to crop Bidens face onto a childs body, put the picture in a cute heart cut-out, and went to Washington and spent the money on a rager of a cocktail party.
I now stand with John Bigcock and 4 eyes when saying " we will hang together" little did they know thats 200 some years later.
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How does any of that relate to football?
Well the trade deadline is here and ends this week which is basically my wet dream (thats not what I meant by relate). With a now added week into the season before playoffs, and really everyone still in the playoff hunt, this should be a big week. To honor the trade deadline and our ancestors who provided us the option to vote; I will be giving each trade a minor breakdown that happened this year and to what I believe the mentality behind each side, thus giving you the right to vote on who won or lost it. Call me John Bigcock.
September 20th: Dustin sends Melvin Gordon to Alan for Alexander Mattison.
- Classic post draft switch on handcuffs. Not much to comment on this one because other than gambling on luck of injury, just a classic switch.
September 28th: Kirk sends Deandre Swift to Doug for AJ Dillion and Sutton
- The first real interesting trade of the year. Kirk realizing he has 3 starting running backs in James Connor, Deandre Swift, and Austin Eckler but doesn't have a "must-start" receiver so he makes his move for Sutton. While also adding AJ Dillon last year was a Top 15-20 running back. Doug on the other hand had Josh Jacobs in the lineup who was off to horrendous start and needed a solid RB#2.
September 29th: Brian sends Curtis Samuel, Kareem Hunt, Tyler Conklin, and DK Metcalf to Will for Gabe Davis and Kyle Pitts.
- At this point in the season Brians fantasy team is on fire the bad way. So the only thing to do is fire-sale the team. Brian had some depth but not quality and needed some starters on his lineup immediatly. Will on the other hand needed depth and was willing to give up a few starters for it (also loves browns players).
September 29th: Kyle send Brandon Aiyuk and Chase edmunds to Brain for Allen Robinson and Khalil Herbert.
- I seeing Brian is having a fire sale decide to jump in on the action. I truly only wanted Khalil Herbert as I was looking to flip him. Allen Robinson was just a little treat thaat came with it. Brian giving 4 players and getting mostert off waviers meant if he got edmunds he'd have the complete backfield of the dolphins. Getting Aiyuk was a little bonus/upgrade from robinson anyways.
October 5th: Kirk send Courtland Sutton to Dustin for Lenoard Fournette.
- Kirk needed a solid #2 Back as James connor was clearly not going to have the same year as last year. Along with that he had a plethera of receivers that weren't #1's but all #2's. Dustin on the other hand Singletary, James Robinson, and Davlin cook already who were off to a hot start but due to drafting "prospect" receivers, he basically didn't have a true 1/2.
October 5th: Kyle sends Khalil Herbert and Tyler Allgeier to Cody for Diontae Johnson.
- My whole plan was to flip Khalil to Cody as David Montgomery got hurt. Packaging another starting back in Allgeier who was in for Cordalle Patterson. Only having 3 recievers on the roster at my time I needed a 4th with high upside with the big dick gunslinging hammer pp Kenny Pickett coming in I decided to pull the trigger (maybe a steelers fan). Cody had major injuries at runningback and only having two runningbacks was in minor desperation to get a bandaid in the position to let his injured players get healthy.
October 19th: Alan sends Jaylen Waddle to Chris for Miles Sanders.
- Alan at this point in the year had Javonate Williams go down and now Melvin Gordon go down/stink. Having basically two #1 recievers makes the move for Miles Sanders who was having a good year. Chris has all the runningbacks but also all the hurt recievers in Kennan Allen and Micheal Thomas and needed a #1 to try to save his year.
Novemeber 1st: Matt send Josh Allen and Darnell Mooney to Kirk for Kyler Murray and Tyler Lockett.
- Matt has literally no WR #2 or #3. Exchanging the QB1 in the league for QB6 isn't that crazy of a dropoff but gaining Tyler Lockett who has proven himself over 8 games is a much needed improvement for him. Kirk wanting QB1 which is an upgrade and still having 4-5 #2 recievers on this team decided to pull the trigger.
Novemeber 3rd: Kyle send Dameon Pierce, Diontae Foreman, and Micheal Pittman to Will for Deandre Hopkins and Cordalle Patterson.
- I set myself up this year for having 3 solid recievers and banked on figuring out RB's as the year goes on. With Breece hall dying and Pittman not putting up the numbers I hoped for I dobuled down and went out searching for the WR. Will losing Gus Edwards and Jonathon taylor needed two starting running backs and could afford a minor decrease in reciever while still having Deebo pulled the trigger.
November 5th: Austin sends Jerry Juedy and Jackobi Meyers to Brain for Raheem Mostert and Devin Duvernay.
- Austin has only had 2 runningbacks on his roster all year up till this point. With bye weeks and now a injured Zeke he needed someone to fill in. Giving 2 recievers he would need one back, so go and grabs the now #1 Devin Duvernay on the ravens to pair up with his QB in Lamar Jackson. Brian making the trade earlier in the year for Gabe Davis at this point hasn't panned out. Along with Devonta Smith being hit or miss, he needed 2 receivers that were more consistent but may not put up as many points as the ceiling for Davis or Smith. So he found them.
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Hopefully showing a bit more light onto what I think people were thinking when they made the trades to begin with. This should provide you the correct information for you to vote on who won or lose the trade.
Worst case is next time I wont spend 246 years typing something like this out and instead go grab a random 3rd grader from my moms class and have them crop the picture of kirk slapping a tortilla shell on chris's face with the person who won/lost the trade and put a little heart around it.
Power Rankings:
1.) A Fierce Breese - Kyle
2.) Hot Dug's - Doug
3.) Scam Fakers - Matt
4.) Douglas DD, Dug - Cody (?)
5.) In Chase We Trust - Lukas
6.) Kamel1231231241255661 - Will
7.) Slay All Day - Chris (Fields/Keenan hype)
8.) My Goodies - Alan
9.) Thiccstooge - Brian
10.) Joint Per Reception - Kirk
11.) Captain Kamarica - Austin
12.) Sunday Cookout - Dustin
More indepth on rosters/rankings next week. Until then.
- My "John Bigcock's" Brain
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