Sex Panthers Week 1 Power Stance?

Marriage is Fantasy Football For those who just want Fantasy Football scroll past my mumbo jumbo. Note: Please do not share with Kathleen. As I get married in 9 days what I have started to learn/notice is that marriage and fantasy football are the same thing. So what I am going to do is steal from Google Translate and literally translate fantasy football into marriage for you.  Maybe this only applies to me (which wouldn't be that shocking) as in my last write-up I brought up how I've been calling Kathleen Hitler, for only Antonio Brown/AB/MBC to only come out on Twitter and call Matt Canada Hitler also. Anywho, follow me here: 1.) Draft Prepwork =  Starting to Dat e - The last year of fantasy football has ended you either are the biggest loser, middle-of-the-pack loser, top-end loser, or the actual winner of last year. In either of the losing scenarios, you are looking forward to next year and probably making some adjustments from your previous year. Kyle Translated: - You...

Generally speaking, I am currently not having fun. Just a quick little update on how my last 72 hours have gone.  - I have slept about 7 hours total of the 72. - I get married in the 3 weeks and basically broke my pinky toe, to the point I can't wear a shoe. - I spent Sunday morning around 5am-6am in a tiny airport in Peniscola throwing up profusely in front of basically the entire airport.  - Kathleen my future wife's birthday is 4/20 and I think views me as a Jew at this point.  Editors note: Kathleen hasn't been a bridezilla by any means but she warned me not to be an idiot and get hurt/fuck myself up 3 weeks before the wedding. I have been an idiot and fucked myself up 3 weeks before the wedding. Editors note 2: Brian is getting an x-ray on his foot this morning so he kinda of saved me in the sense I can just say "At least I'm not Brian". Here is his foot: "Kyle just get to the fantasy football portion" - all of you probably.  Well, I am and Bria...

Finally, football is here, and I wish it wasn't. I won basically all of my week 1 bets, shout out to the Eagles for holding onto -4.5 and closing out my parlay. I don't give a fuck about money or fantasy when I sit next to Dan in his fucking basement and he gets to watch me blow my fucking brains out live in 4k. The Steelers may have just ruined the entirety of my year, life, and overall existence as a human. Between the hours of 1-4 p.m. I had over 100 text messages of me just getting eviscerated by everyone I've ever come in contact with in my life. Here's a few examples: PS: Dustin was openly trashing the Browns and screenshotted him hammering the Bengals, meanwhile I openly text in the group and tell Kirk in person "I am betting the Browns and I think they own the Bengals" yet none of you shit talked Dustin at all is insane. Either A.) shows how stupid and forgetful you are or B.) shows how much I own of your tiny, tiny brains. PSPS: Brian chirping me all ...